Meyers Briggs and the middle path

A basic point in Buddhism is the idea of avoiding extremes and seeking a middle path. Our natural tendency is to lean toward things, people and experiences that make us feel comfortable and happy and to avoid ones that make us uncomfortable and unhappy.  The problem with this is that avoiding an unpleasant experience doesn't make it disappear. It still exists and by not accepting it and trying to find a balance with it, we are not fully present. Not in harmony.

Carl Jung had a similar theory about our individual psychology. He believed that we all have parts of ourselves that we use to excess and parts that we repress and try to distance ourselves from. To Jung, this not only created imbalance, but also created a situation where the repressed parts of ourselves were influencing our lives from an unconscious place. It was from this point of view that he said,

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” 

His theory of Individuation involves becoming aware of the unconscious and repressed parts of ourselves and finding a way to integrate them in a healthy way. 

I discovered Carl Jung a decade before I discovered Buddhism. I was an avid reader in high school, consuming classic literature and books on metaphysics and mysticism with equal fervor. When I stumbled onto some article of Jung's regarding the shadow self, I became enthralled. I'm sure many of us in high school were very aware of having a version of ourselves that we didn't share with society. The idea that we all try to amputate parts of our personality that don't fit in with the outside world - it resonated. His perspective, that it was necessary to revive and integrate those parts, gave me a sense of freedom and hope. 

A few years later, in further reading, I came across the Meyers Briggs test. (If you're curious about your type - this test is pretty quick.) The Meyers Briggs was created by students of Jung to try to map the psyche and see what ways of functioning we prefer and which functions we avoid. I took the test, read the description, agreed and then went about my life. 

 Years later, when a Buddhist teacher gave a dharma talk about becoming self aware to limit the power of the ego over our lives, I heard echoes of Carl Jung in the teaching. There is an element of self- acceptance in both that I find incredibly powerful. Each promotes the non-judgemental space to truly look at ourselves and accept what's there, while recognizing the possibility of growth. 

In the next decade, I discovered Buddhism and energy work, traveled internationally, became more self aware, and far more extraverted.A few years ago, I decided to take the Meyers Briggs test again. I felt like I had changed so much in the past ten years and it would be interesting to see how that might have changed the way my psyche functions. Interestingly, my results were exactly the same as they were ten years ago. I had to laugh at myself. Because growth doesn't mean changing who we are, it means integrating all the parts of who we are and trying to find balance. 

Here's a simple breakdown of the way Meyers Briggs works. There are four main functions that we may rely on heavily or avoid. There is a spectrum for each and different ways that the functions interact with each other so these are used as a basic guideline with tons of room for variations.  I bolded the letters by which each is referenced. 

Introverted or Extraverted - This shows whether we prefer our inner world or the outer world and where we get our energy. An extravert will feel revived after spending lots of time with a crowd and may begin to feel depleted after spending long periods of time alone. An introvert will feel drained after spending long periods of time with others and will feel refreshed after a significant amount of time alone. 

Example - I am an introvert but I love hanging out with my good friends. I love meeting new people and hearing new perspectives. I love live music and concerts. I truly enjoy sharing experiences with others. But I reach a point where I will feel completely drained and cranky if I don't have a decent amount of time to myself. My extravert friends are all over the spectrum of E. There are some who feel uncomfortable being alone and there are those who are ok with it. The common point they all share is that when they are around others, they feel energized and more lively. 

From a Buddhist perspective, we need to acknowledge and accept the world we're most comfortable inhabiting and how we recharge our internal batteries. But we need to try to strike a balance between our individual self and our community so that we are comfortable alone and with others. 

INtuitive or  Sensing - This shows how we prefer to take in information. Someone with more dominant N relies on their instinct, interpretation and reading between the lines whereas a more dominant S will interact based on practical, tangible facts and the physical information at hand. The intuitive might take the physical experience of the moment and layer it with impressions, imagined possibilities and assumptions based on nuances. The sensor would really interact with the present moment from a physical perspective, taking in information via the five senses. 

Example -  One of the most uncomfortable experiences for me as an N type is if someone is talking to me about something mundane and unemotional but their vibe, body language and general impression is of emotional pain. They might be talking about a grocery list, but if they seem like they're upset - that's all I hear, and they haven't even said it, that information hasn't been relayed through the five senses. Someone who is more Sensing relies more on what their five senses tell them about a situation. They might miss undertones and nuances but they truly experience the present moment from a physical standpoint. I have gone whole days lost in daydreams, plans for the future or a good novels and completely forgotten to eat. My S friends cannot even comprehend how that could happen. Eating is not only a practical part of life, it's also something they enjoy with their senses. 

From a Buddhist perspective, we need to acknowledge and accept our individual preference for the way we receive information. We also need to try to strike a balance between the two so that we are not floating in the ether of the invisible cosmos and disconnected from the world around us or conversely, limited by or consumed by the five senses and daily details of life. 

Feeling or Thinking - Okay, obviously we all have feelings and we all have thoughts. This category is about which of the two influences our decision making and our daily lives. Someone with dominant T will act mind over emotions most of the time, preferring clear rational thinking to emotional motivation. Someone with dominant F will focus more on their own and others feelings when acting. 

Example - One of my best friends is T and I am F. We have been friends for a really long time and always have great conversations. She's a very caring and loyal friend, as am I, so that creates a foundation where our conversations can really highlight our different ways of approaching issues. Personally, I am motivated by emotional connection. If there is a feeling present there is a motivation for me to act. Recently I had a political conversation with this friend and I could really see how different we approached the situation. She pointed out impacts of policy that I had never even thought about and maintained a level, thoughtful approach while discussing even the most upsetting aspects of our country's political system. I know that she understands and cares about the people who are negatively affected by flawed politics, and yet her approach to the topic was completely analytical. Listening to her I recognized that she was able to use this intellectual approach to reach conclusions and possible solutions that might never have occurred to me, steeped as I was in my revolutionary passion. 

From a Buddhist perspective, we need to accept and acknowledge our preference and motivation to act on feeling or thoughts. From there, we can try to strike a balance so that we're neither irrationally following our feelings wherever they lead us or conversely, acting only on rational thinking and divorcing emotion from the situation at hand. 

Perceiving or Judgement - This one is often misunderstood. It's not about being perceptive or judgemental, it's about how we prefer to deal with structure in our lives. Someone who leans toward P prefers to  remain open to possible events and not commit to one thing. They enjoy the freedom of taking things as they come and 'going with the flow'. Someone who leans toward J prefers to make a decision and follow it through to it's natural end. The J prefers to use organization and order to structure their lives.

Example - oh, so many examples here :) I have a lot of P friends who like to leave plans open to change or not make plans until the last minute, based on what's going on and how they feel in the moment. This for them is freedom. Being a J type, I prefer to have plans made and put them in my calendar. When new possibilities come up, I schedule around that set plan. This feels like freedom to me because something important has a set action attached to it, so I'm free to interact with other events as they come up. The downside of each -  a P type might have so many options they can't decide what to do or they leave things open until the last minute and miss chances for things they really did want to do. The J type might schedule themselves into a corner so they're not free to do something that pops up at the last minute or they might get so hung up on how they 'planned' for things to happen that they can't appreciate a happy accident. 

From a Buddhist perspective, we need to accept and acknowledge how we react to structure. Do we overuse structure or avoid it like the plague?  From there we can strive to find a balance by finding ways that we can use structure in a balanced way that feels supportive to us, but not confining. In a previous post I wrote about acceptance. From a buddhist perspective, acceptance doesn't mean just accepting everything that happens to us. It means recognizing all of the elements involved, acting on the elements that we have power to affect and going with the flow with the elements that are beyond our control. 

The keys to the Buddhist middle path and Jung's Individuation are self awareness and integration. Neither Buddha nor Jung asks us to change who we are - they both ask us to expand our concept of who we are and include those parts of ourselves that we avoid because we feel they weaken us. Both tell us that in ignoring these aspects of ourselves, we become unbalanced and therefore weaker.

Another aspect of Meyers Briggs that I've found helpful from a buddhist perspective is increasing understanding. I've had friends that don't like making decisions and prefer not to make set plans and because that's not in my personality, it always confounded me. Looking at it from a place of Perceiving function, it makes sense to me. In the past few years I've become very aware of how much work I need to do on integrating the Sensing part of myself. Remembering to eat food is a good start. I can't always live on coffee. My friends who lean toward Sensing also help me get out of my daydreams and be present with them in the moment. My extravert friends remind me that sometimes it's fun to be in a crowd (sometimes). My thinking friends show me sides of an issue my emotion may have blinded me to. All of these experiences help me creep a little closer to a middle path.